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General Category => The Coffee Shop => Topic started by: ChuckD on October 14, 2014, 12:42:39 pm

Title: Shhhhhhh
Post by: ChuckD on October 14, 2014, 12:42:39 pm

An elderly couple Pauline & Chuck were recently attending a church service at their retirement village.  About halfway through the service, Pauline took a pen and paper out of her purse, and wrote a note and handed it to Chuck.  The note said:" I just let out a silent fart, what do you think I should do?"  Chuck scribbled back: "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."    


True story only the names have been changed.

Title: Re: Shhhhhhh
Post by: wombatie on October 15, 2014, 01:57:51 am

  :o :o :o ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Marg

Title: Re: Shhhhhhh
Post by: Honeycow on October 15, 2014, 05:57:24 am

After a rather long sermon an older woman whispers to her friend, "that was so long I think my butt fell asleep!". "I know",said the friend, "I heard it snore several times."

Title: Re: Shhhhhhh
Post by: Rover2 on October 15, 2014, 09:16:11 pm

Still laughing!!!   ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D :) :) :) ;D ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: Shhhhhhh
Post by: cdrover(Clyde) on October 20, 2014, 12:41:37 pm

These jokes are a real gass!! ;D ;D ;D
Lets get down to business!

An Englishman, an american a scott and a newfie were debating what the fastest thing in the world was.
The Englishman said, " The fastest thing in the world is a thought, You dont do anything and it is in your head instantly"
The American says ' The fastest thing in the world is a blink, you dont even have to think, it just happens automatically".
The Scott said "nooo da fastest thing in the world is electricity, simply flick a switch and the light is on just as you hit the switch"
The Newfie " bys, ya got it all wrong, the fastest ting in da world is diarrhea, dats the fastest ting in the world"
Well the other three asked, "How do you figure that."
The Newfie says, " The udder night I wakes wit a cramp and before I could tink, blink or turn on the light I had it done in me pants" :-[ :-[  and that will be my contribution to your day.

Title: Re: Shhhhhhh
Post by: jeff44 on October 20, 2014, 07:48:06 pm

You guys should really issue a drink alert!

Title: Re: Shhhhhhh
Post by: rob roy on October 25, 2014, 10:44:15 am

I'll have to clean the key board again Clyde. Thanks for the warning. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Rob Roy.

Title: Re: Shhhhhhh
Post by: ClayJ on October 27, 2014, 11:38:19 pm

In the middle of a rather long winded and monotonous church talk, the speaker reached a point where he paused for emphasis.  Into that utter silence, my 3 year old nephew said loudly to his dad "Take me out and spank me"

True story.