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General Category => The Coffee Shop => Topic started by: Russ C on November 04, 2011, 09:04:30 am

Title: New Weight Loss Plan
Post by: Russ C on November 04, 2011, 09:04:30 am
*** Read at your own risk ****


A man calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought, he takes off after her.

A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up.

The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.

On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning and beautiful woman he has ever seen in his life.

She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me."

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot.

This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck.

So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."

"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,"If I catch you, you are mine!!!"

He lost 63 pounds that week.   

 :o  :o  :o  :o  :o  LMBO  ::)  ::)  ::)  ::)  ::)
Title: Re: New Weight Loss Plan
Post by: GrayBeard on November 04, 2011, 09:31:35 am
I have to say..this story is a bit "racy"!

~~~GB~~~
Title: Re: New Weight Loss Plan
Post by: dgman on November 04, 2011, 10:43:58 am
I have to say..this story is a bit "racy"!

~~~GB~~~
Creamed corn!!! ;D
Title: Re: New Weight Loss Plan
Post by: GrayBeard on November 04, 2011, 12:19:05 pm
Card carrying member of "Punsters Anonymous"!

~~~GB~~~
Title: Re: New Weight Loss Plan
Post by: Dawie on November 04, 2011, 04:03:16 pm
LOL!
David
Title: Re: New Weight Loss Plan
Post by: Marcellarius on November 05, 2011, 05:14:27 am
HAHAHA

that's why sometimes you should be thankful  with second best  ;)