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General Category => The Coffee Shop => Topic started by: Gabby on July 20, 2011, 04:14:01 am
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DO NOT KNOW OR CARE IF THIS IS ACTUALLY TRUE BUT LIKE THE SOUTHERN ATTITUDE
Subject: Democrat, Republican, or Southerner?
OK
Finally, a grading system that is honest and upright and is able to handle
personal terrorism completely and finally.
Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?
Here is a little test that will help you decide.
The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a
Deserted street with your wife
And two small children.
Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife
Comes around the corner,
Locks eyes with you,
Screams obscenities,
Raises the knife, and charges at you...
You are carrying a
Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:
Democrat's Answer:
* Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
* What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP?
* Does the man look poor or oppressed?
* Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?
* Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
* Could we run away?
* What does my wife think?
* What about the kids?
* Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
* What does the law say about this situation?
* Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
* Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
* Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
* Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
* If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
* Should I call 9-1-1?
* Why is this street so deserted?
* We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.
* Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
* I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
* This is all so confusing!
............ .......... ......... ......... ......... .........
.................. ...
Republican's Answer:
BANG!
........... .......... ......... .......... ......... .........
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Southerner's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!
Click
Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!'
'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?!
Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'
Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!
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Guess I'm a Sourtherner!
Were you really up and posting this at 4 am?
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That "Southerner" (Texan) is my favorite cousin in Dallas!
~~~GB~~~
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You would appreciate the shirt we just gave our oldest son for his birthday. It reads "Southern Man -- Wearing camo and packing ammo". and yes, he does often carry a Kimber 1911 (legally of course).
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Guess I'm a Sourtherner!
Were you really up and posting this at 4 am?
I sort of figured there would be a few of us scattered around, that extra 10 round magazine assures they won't be getting up and scaring any more little kids. Good idea to have plenty just in case there is more than one. The republican was just Conserving, living up to his reputation of being a tight wad by only shooting once. Heck who ever goes to the range and only shoots one bullet, that's no fun at all. Got to make some noise! ;D
I'm in the Pacific time zone and the forum clock is on central or eastern time, not sure which. I am a knight owl however and even have a knight mare to ride. LOL
The Kimber is just a tad large to carry so I opted for a little more compact tool, it holds more buwetts too. 8)
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I'm so southern I used to date a guy named Bubba ... Oh, such sweet memories ::) ::)
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I'm so southern I used to date a guy named Bubba ... Oh, such sweet memories ::) ::)
You better delet this before your "G" man finds out. I know he's the jealous type. LOL
While I was at Millington I dated a gal called Bubbaette! ;D ;D
Gabby