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General Category => The Coffee Shop => Topic started by: newfie on December 22, 2013, 03:08:35 pm

Title: A Christmas funny hope it doesn't offend anyone
Post by: newfie on December 22, 2013, 03:08:35 pm

Onions And Christmas Trees

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how
many kinds of boobs are there?

The father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs:

In her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and firm.

In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.

After 60, they are like onions'.

'Onions?'

'Yes, you see them and they make you cry'.

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, 'Mum, how
many kinds of 'willies' are there?.

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 'Well dear, a man goes
through three phases.

In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard.

In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable.

After his 60's, it is like a Christmas Tree.'

'A Christmas tree?'

'Yes - the tree is dead and the balls are just for decoration.'

Title: Re: A Christmas funny hope it doesn't offend anyone
Post by: Merlin on December 22, 2013, 03:34:21 pm

No offence, but oh so true, for men and women.

***Merlin***

Title: Re: A Christmas funny hope it doesn't offend anyone
Post by: rob roy on December 22, 2013, 04:50:47 pm

Know the feeling well Newfie, unfortunately. If I'm lucky, I might get a bit of TINSEL. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D.
Rob Roy.

Title: Re: A Christmas funny hope it doesn't offend anyone
Post by: wombatie on December 23, 2013, 01:53:59 am

 :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
That was funny especially the last half.

Marg

Title: Re: A Christmas funny hope it doesn't offend anyone
Post by: Gabby on December 23, 2013, 03:11:40 am

Quote from: rob roy on December 22, 2013, 04:50:47 pm

Know the feeling well Newfie, unfortunately. If I'm lucky, I might get a bit of TINSEL. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D.
Rob Roy.

Good luck getting anyone to do the decorating, you old PERVERT   LOL
Private joke folks. There RR that will eat them up with curiosity wondering what we're talking about. LOL
Merry Christmas everyone, it's getting closer just 2 days to wait.

Remember when you were a kid about 5 to 11 and the days just crawled  and the suspense was killing you? Some of us even got pretty good at finding the hiding places and sneaking a peak. Moi non. LOL I have some ocean front property in AZ for sale cheap!
Drive sober and carefully folks. Even in Scotchland.  ;D
Gabby

Title: Re: A Christmas funny hope it doesn't offend anyone
Post by: king310 on December 24, 2013, 01:19:32 pm

Now I know why my wife hangs all the mirrors higher up the wall!

Title: Re: A Christmas funny hope it doesn't offend anyone
Post by: cdrover(Clyde) on December 24, 2013, 04:32:17 pm

The mighty oak has turned into a bendy juniper or a weeping willow.  :o