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General Category => The Coffee Shop => Topic started by: Billy in Va on January 21, 2013, 10:05:37 am

Title: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Billy in Va on January 21, 2013, 10:05:37 am
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95-year-old grandmother and comfort her.

When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."  Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that two people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.

"Oh, no, my dear," replied granny.  "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring.  It was just the right rhythm.  Nice and slow and even.  Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."

She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "and if the damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today."

Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: king310 on January 21, 2013, 10:29:10 am
you scream, I scream, We all love to scream for Ice Cream :o :o :o :o
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Dan26 on January 21, 2013, 10:40:25 am
 :D :D :D :D Hold on while wipe away the tears :D :D :D :D Very funny!
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Marcellarius on January 21, 2013, 10:45:18 am
LOL!!!  ;D :D ;D
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: newfie on January 21, 2013, 10:48:14 am
LOL
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: king310 on January 21, 2013, 11:09:55 am
uuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh........oooooohhhhh......uuuuhhhh.....more......need some lube.......
Gertrude!!! I told you to turn off that speech recognition on the computer. Now everyone will think we are doing something other than trying to get you in your girdle.

 ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: rob roy on January 21, 2013, 02:05:05 pm
Speaking of ice cream trucks Billy. Scotland has the highest percentage of double glazing in the land. Not because of the cold it's just so the kids cant hear the ice cream truck. ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::).
Rob Roy
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Keefie on January 21, 2013, 02:11:08 pm
Is that right you had triple glazing fitted Rob?? ::) ::)
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: ChuckD on January 21, 2013, 04:21:26 pm
When they were very young, I told my kids that the ice cream truck rings it's bell when it is out of ice cream.  That worked for a long time.  My grandkids just laughed at me when I said it.
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: rob roy on January 21, 2013, 04:47:09 pm
Hi Keefie, if you don't stop writing jokes about us tight fisted Scots, I'm going to stop borrowing your newspaper.  ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
Rob Roy.
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Billy in Va on January 21, 2013, 05:04:43 pm
@ Rob and Keefie  You two are constantly at each other and it is uncalled for. Now BOTH of you go wash out your mouth with this
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: cdrover(Clyde) on January 21, 2013, 05:27:11 pm
Boys ho boys here is a crowd I am intact with.  ;D ;D  keep it coming, and Billy that was a great joke :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: wombatie on January 22, 2013, 05:34:56 am
Hahahahahahahahahahah  loved it.

Marg
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: rob roy on January 22, 2013, 01:52:16 pm
Hi Billy, that 6% proof toothpaste is a bit weak, since Keefie and I use a 70% proof mouthwash but we SWALLOW IT!!!!. Don't we Keefie????? :o :o :o :o :o :o.
Rob Roy.
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Keefie on January 22, 2013, 06:02:36 pm
Yep Rob, but I'd drink it all if I could get away with it!!!!
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: rob roy on January 23, 2013, 05:37:20 am
Hi Keefie, we could share it with Clyde, Gabby and Billy, or anyone else who wants to join in. I got about a dozen bottles of the nectar when I retired and no two bottles are the same. Every time I open the cupboard I'm like a Fox in a chicken coop: Don't know which one to go for, maybe Marg could help me make a choice. :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D.
Rob Roy.
P.S, What the H**L has this got to do with Sunday morning sex ????????????
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Russ C on January 23, 2013, 09:43:58 am
LMBO, good one.  :D  :D  :D  :D  :D

It's funny how posts can take off in another direction like this one.  ;)
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Keefie on January 23, 2013, 09:55:28 am
Rob,  If you saw my ex wife you'd not have to ask the question, you would just be asking for stronger mouthwash lol ::) ::) ::)
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: rob roy on January 23, 2013, 10:35:25 am
Hi Keith, if she was as bad you say,I would probably drink weedkiller. If it was my wife, she would go and buy it for me and probably give me the b***dy receipt.  ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::).
Rob Roy. 
Title: Re: Sunday Morning Sex
Post by: Keefie on January 23, 2013, 05:56:25 pm
ok Rob you got me on that one lol  :D :D :D :D