Here's your sign

[Bill P]

I couldn't help myself. 

Once again, sitting at my saw with my doors open on the shop, another neighbor walks up and says, "Ya makin' somthin'?"  I said, "No, I'm running my saw in reverse so I can make this chess piece back into a block of wood."

 

Bill

[dgman]

Bill, You know what the remedy to the nosy neighbor is don't you? KEEP THE DOOR CLOSED!

[Gabby]

Bill, You know what the remedy to the nosy neighbor is don't you? KEEP THE DOOR CLOSED!

Dan that would be NO FUN, just think of all the giggles we've had from Bill's neighbors.
Gabby

[Bill P]

I've always had an open door policy. 

Bill

[Chachi]

I swear Bill I think you must live in the "Dumbest people area in the world" you really should sell the house and move to the "smart People area" but some people I swear........lol Good thing your handy with the one liners.

[Bill P]

I love where I live.  I'm the smartest one there!   

Bill

[Chachi]

I guess that is true Bill but we don't want you to get "dumbed down" by the area though.

[Bill P]

Lisa just reminded me about my "Bill Engvall" moment a couple of summers back.  I was loading my golf clubs in the back of the truck when the guy across the street shouted out, "You going golfing?"  I yelled back, "No, skydiving.  Here's your sign."  The neighbor on my side of the street started laughing so hard we thought he was going to lose his balance.

Bill

[dgman]

Bill, You sound like a grumpy neighbor!

[Chachi]

Yep know the feeling we were moving from our old house to the new a few years back and we loaded up a moving truck and the one across the street (I swear on the Bible this happened) she asked hey y'all moving I siad nope we just loaded it up to see how many boxes we needed to move (here it comes) she looked at me with a staright face and "so how does it take?".............I about fell off the back of the truck from Laughing..

[Bill P]

Chachi, that's hilarious!

Dan, no, I'm not Grumpy, I'm more like Dopey. 

Actually, my neighbors think I'm eccentric.  I always smile and say "hi," which throws most of them.

Bill

[Gabby]

The problem is you live too close to the CA line where all those transplants ended up, you know how those Californians are! LOL
That will get Dan seeing red. LMAO
Gabby

[dgman]

Hey Gabby, I'm not a transplant, I'm a native. In fact my grandfather rode with Pancho Villa! He spied a young lady, kidnapped her and married her. They had sixteen children, one of them was my mother!

[AnotherSteve]

When I was a restaurant manager I made periodic cash register "pull", where I took out the large bills to put in the safe.  One day while I was in the midst of doing the "pull" one of my customers came up to me and asked. "Do you work here?"  My reply, of course, was, "No, I'm robbing the place."  You just can't fix stupid!!

[Bill P]

Hey, Dan, that sounds like a fascinating story. 

Steve, things like this make me a big Bill Engvall fan.

Bill