Author Topic: Georgia Grandma In Court  (Read 1980 times)

Offline Russ C

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Georgia Grandma In Court
« on: May 20, 2014, 06:12:28 am »
COFFEE WARNING :.. :o  :o  :o

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,

'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
russ@simplywoodencreations.com

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #1 on: May 20, 2014, 06:27:41 am »
good one, Russ--I'll use it--thanks for the smile--Richard

Offline newfie

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #2 on: May 20, 2014, 06:36:13 am »
LOL good one, Russ


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Offline Joleet

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #3 on: May 20, 2014, 10:02:43 am »
Well.... we all are taught not to lie.....right?
Ron... Twin Falls, Idaho

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Offline EIEIO

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #4 on: May 20, 2014, 10:32:00 am »
Sounds like my 6th grade teacher, Sr. Mary Elephant.
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Offline Dakota Saw Dust

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #5 on: May 20, 2014, 01:38:53 pm »
The good news & the bad.  Good joke - but it sounds too much like our current politicians :-[.

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #6 on: May 20, 2014, 04:49:34 pm »
Superb Russ. Thanks for the coffee warning. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Rob Roy.

Offline wombatie

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #7 on: May 21, 2014, 02:35:10 am »
 :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D  Good one Russ.

Marg
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Offline Keefie

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #8 on: May 21, 2014, 10:15:03 am »
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D Loved it Russ, had to share it on FB
It's all a case of "Mind over Matter",  The Government don't Mind, and I don't Matter.

Offline EIEIO

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Broken site?
« Reply #9 on: May 22, 2014, 10:46:47 am »
Russ - sorry to get to you from here but the navigation buttons on the forum have disappeared on my Chrome browser. Is this just me or is everyone having this issue? RMHayes@RMHayes.US
EX-21 arrived 2-1-2013!
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Offline DWSudekum

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Re: Broken site?
« Reply #10 on: May 22, 2014, 11:17:12 am »
Russ - sorry to get to you from here but the navigation buttons on the forum have disappeared on my Chrome browser. Is this just me or is everyone having this issue? RMHayes@RMHayes.US

Russ I too am having this issue... it is with both Chrome and IE for me.

DW
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countryscroller

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #11 on: May 22, 2014, 11:18:20 am »
I have the same issue on Chrome and Firefox, so I assume it is just some glitches that Steve his working out. You can still post and what not.

Offline Russ C

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #12 on: May 22, 2014, 12:29:58 pm »
Steve is aware and working on the problem. 
russ@simplywoodencreations.com

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Offline cdrover(Clyde)

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Re: Georgia Grandma In Court
« Reply #13 on: May 22, 2014, 08:11:24 pm »
good one, thanks for the laugh ;D ;D
What are we here for but to help others. (Author unknown)
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